1.) No ads. I won’t ask you to skip ads after 5 seconds, how to find singles in your area or ask if you want to advertise your page on Facebook.
2.) I may or may not be using the phrase ‘Unicorn spaff’ That will be worth the price of admission alone.
3.) It will make your hair thicker and most lustrous. No wait, that’s salon level shampoo isn’t it?
4.) I’ll be using a microphone. Have you seen these things? I don’t need to yell and you will all be able to hear without cupping your ear. The 21st century truly is amazing.
5.) I won’t be using fusion words. You know words like chillax or amazeballs. I don’t want to make a frenemy out of you. Crap, ok I got that one out of system but I’m done now.
Dave Thornton – Tall & Pointy is on at the Banquet Room, Victoria Hotel for the duration of the festival
2) A Warm Spring Morning,
Rice Farmer Begins His Day,
The Sun Warms his Soul.
3) The Coy Pond is Full
The Coy Pond, Splashing with Light,
What Joy the Coy Have.
4) The Young Labourer
Rides to His Workplace, Sunrise.
The Boy Learns Ethic.
5) She Kneels to Master,
He Takes Her By the Warm Hand,
Pride In Her Soul.
AUNTY DONNA AND THE FAX MACHINE SHOP is on at the Portland Hotel except for on Mondays when it will be at the Melbourne Town Hall.
1. It features Bron Batten and her parents- live onstage!
2. The Sydney Morning Herald called it ‘Excruciating and hilarious…’ (in a good way)
3. Her Dad tells awesome Dad jokes
4. It won the award for Best Experimental Performance at the 2011 Melbourne Fringe Festival
5. It’s funny and also arty (in a good way)
Sweet Child of Mine is on at 7pm at The Northcote Town Hall, 4th-12th of april