Scottish Falsetto Socks: Eurovision Sock Contest

By Ron Bingham

The return of the Socks sees our noble heroes performing the Eurovision Sock Contest, in a truly rude and naughty manner. Before the show started, some of the songs from previous shows were being played as the audience arrived and, when that was turned off to allow the show to begin there was a lot of disappointed noises from punters who were merrily humming along. These socks have fans. Like me.

The Eurovision Sock Contest sees six countries vying for the top prize, France (so many stereotypes), Scandinavia (yes, ALL of Scandinavia as a time-saving measure), Germany (techno-Kraftwerkish), a mish-mash of all the Balkan states which I could never repeat, Ireland (a garden gnome as Graham Norton bitching about the conditions Eurovision commentators work under – sounding fairly true to life) and the UK (a filthy song about a political decision made by this country a few years ago).

A lot of swearing, bad jokes, terrible puns, dodgy accents, dubious political commentary, ridiculous costume changes and all the other things one has come to expect from The Socks down the years. Ridiculous, hilarious and totally silly, fun show. I still believe there must be a monkey hidden behind the curtain helping with some of the trickier costume changes. Instead it’s a very sweaty Kev Sutherland performing this insane marathon alone every night. May he have the stamina to keep it up for many years to come.

Eurovision Sock Contest is on at Gilded Balloon Teviot