Judith Lucy & Denise Scott: Still Here

Reviewed by Lisa Clark

What Better way to decompress after the last two years than to let Jude and Scotty lead us through the hellscape of our unprecedented, shared experience?

The house music is a string of gorgeous showtunes alternating between Judy Garland and Carol Channing while the stage is set with two comfy lounge chairs, a lamp, an old radio, a harp on a plinthā€¦ itā€™s a setting to evoke a comforting homey vibe for two best friends enduring lockdown together. The set seems to be ready and waiting, quietly, for the chaos to unfold.

Judith Lucy and Denise Scott do not let us down. Melbourneā€™s own odd couple tell the best and funniest tales about the pandemic. Each leave the stage throughout on various pretexts, usually to do with the latest fad hobby of the pandemic, many of which, weā€™d forgotten about. This gives the other the time and space to have some intimate storytelling time with the audience. There are also big silly props, wigs, costumes, singing, dancing, running gags galore and surprise special guests. Wackiness builds to a hilarious, surprise, apocalyptic crescendo, but donā€™t panic, we are in the safe hands of professionals.

Denise and Judith have been making comedy together for decades and theyā€™ve been working this show up before audiences interstate, so unsurprisingly itā€™s tight as a drum. Yes, OK, Iā€™ve heard them do quite a bit of this material, over the past year or so, but Iā€™m a fan, so have been following what theyā€™ve been up to. I find I’mĀ  laughing my arse off anyway and it makes the surprises all the more enjoyable. I’m hugely impressed with how theyā€™ve put this whole show together, well, theyā€™ve had plenty of time on their hands and have used lockdown wisely, it’s a fabulous production.

I’ve seen a lot of their joint work and honestly think this is the best show they’ve done. To take some pretty genuinely dark, depressing experiences and spin them into cathartic comedy gold takes talent and experience. Theyā€™ve still got it and Theyā€™re Still Here. Thank god.

Judith Lucy and Denise Scott perform Still Here at The Arts Centre Playhouse until April 24

https://www.comedyfestival.com.au/2022/shows/still-here

A Year’s Round Up and 5 Very Good Festival Shows of 2016

By Lisa Clark

Itā€™s hard to think of any great positive things that happened to the world in 2016. Apart from the odd sporting achievement, it was a nonstop pileup of deplorable crud. Australian comedy however didnā€™t let us down, delivering performances that will stand out, no doubt, for years to come. So to cheer myself up about the dreadful year that was I thought Iā€™d just do a roundup of good things that happened in Australian Comedy this year.

It always brings me joy to see good comedy coming out of TV, I can remember when I would be rolling in the aisles to so many comedians on stage and felt so frustrated that their voices were not heard on TV except occasionally on the odd panel show. It was one of the reasons I set up this site. I wanted the world to know how wonderful Australian standup comedians are. This year it was so satisfying to see so many live standup performances on TV shows such as Comedy Next Gen and Comedy Up Late as well as the usual Festival Galas and Just For Laughs specials. We saw comedians working in different formats like The Katering Show, Sammy Jā€™s Playground Politics, Whoā€™s Line is it Anyway Australia and Hard Quiz. Itā€™s exciting to watch Comedy Showroom give fresh comedy ideas a go and to see the sweet sitcom Rosehaven bloom so beautifully. Sitcoms have always been so bloody hard to do successfully in Australia and this year weā€™ve also had Here Come the Habibs doing well on 9 of all places and Upper Middle Bogan as strong, funny and heart-warming as ever in its third season. Ā This is all along side regular shows such as Mad As Hell, Julia Zemiroā€™s Home Delivery and The Weekly. Ā There was happily too much comedy on TV for me to cover properly but Iā€™ll leave that to the TV websites. Just to say 2016 was a great year to see Australian standup comedians doing exciting and wonderful things on TV and of course beaming around the world online.

Meanwhile comedians on stage have been creating astonishing, hilarious work. I didnā€™t get to see everything, as usual, itā€™s just impossible, but I thought Iā€™d share some of my own personal highlights of the year.

The Melbourne International Comedy Festival was celebrating 30 years as a Thing and put on a fun party for comedy fans with shows such as Cal Wilsonā€™s Sunday arvos at The Victorian Arts Centre speaking with different generations of comedians in The Decades That Were and comedy tours withĀ Rod Quantock.

Also at the Festival this year was The Wedding of Zoe Coombes Marr and Rhys Nicholson. There have been a few great comedy weddings over the years, but this riotous spectacle which was making a clear statement in support of same-sex marriage could not be bettered. The bridesmaids were Denise Scott, Judith Lucy and Celia Pacquola, MC Hannah Gadsby made a fabulous funny and moving speech. The Priest was Geraldine Hickey, Celebrant Ben Noble. Entertainment was provided by Tina Del Twist, Peter & Bambi Heaven, Hot Brown Honey, The Daredevil Chicken Club, The Butterfly Glee Club, The Royal Melbourne Philharmonic and Melbourne Uni Choirs, Wil Anderson, Adrienne Truscott and The True Australian Patriots.

Other general comedy highlights were laughter filled Sunday afternoons at the live podcast recordings of Josh Earlā€™s Who Do You Think I Am? Ā There was the return of The Bedroom Philosopher at Local Laughs singing about haberdashery and a reboot of The Doug Anthony Allstars. Tripod celebrated 20 years on stage with a gift of their songs in book form andĀ performing them with guests on stage, ending the year with one of their best Christmas shows ever. The new exciting discoveries in 2016 included funny musical acts Jude Perl and Sarah Wall & Freya Long of The Astrudes, then the astute, warm, political comedy of Sami Shah, Alanta Colley and character comedian Haley Tantau as her alter ego Cindy Salmon.

Finally, as is traditional, Iā€™m including an End of Year List; 5 Very Good Festival Shows of 2016. As you can imagine itā€™s hard to pick out only five great festival shows for the whole year, its been a really great year for live comedy.

 

5 Very Good Festival Shows of 2016
Zoe Coombs Marr
1. Ā Zoe Coombes-Marr Trigger Warning. (MICF) The show captured the zeitgeist of the comedy world. I was laughing so hard I was worried Iā€™d lose control of my bodily functions. I literally fell off my seat at one point. So many thoughts Iā€™ve been thinking that she wrapped up and detonated. She destroyed me and remade me as a stronger woman. It won the Barry Award for best show at the 2016 MICF and deservedly so.

(Thanks to modern technology and smart TV people itā€™s been filmed and you can probably see it on ABCiView as part of Comedy Next Gen, not quite the same as live, but do it. WATCH IT. Then watch all the others)

sammy-j-award-winner

 

2. Sammy J – Hero Complex. (Melbourne Fringe) Sammy has been wowing audiences for years, but this one had the audience whooping and cheering with pure joy. Itā€™s about the love of unpopular nerdy pursuits, in this case a passion for The Phantom comics and a friendship borne from that. The show is full of secrets and reveals, so it hard to say more except that it is gobsmacking, weepingly hilarious and will have you grinning for hours, perhaps days afterwards. This won Best Comedy at the Melbourne Fringe Festival and will get a run at festivals in 2017 so DON’TĀ miss it.

 

Zanzoop pic

3. ZanzoopĀ – Feeble Minds. (MICF) Who knew a late night show in a rundown night club about an alien chat show would become the talk of MICF? All three performers added their amazing talents, my highlights being Aaron Chen as Owen Wilson with Tom Walker as Jackie Chan and the heart-warming family reunion of snarky host Zanzoop (Sam Campbell) and his alien dad (Cam Campbell) at the end.

 

4. Micheal Williams: An Evening with Michael Williams (who is trapped under a boulder) ā€“ with Jack Druce. (MICF) Michael has moved from delighting us with his clip board of sophisticated cartoon humour to giving us an all singing, all dancing audio visual extravaganza and puppet show.Michael Williams 2016 A delightfully silly show had the audience gasping when the boulder suddenly came to life and was fun for the whole family. Michael has received a 2017 Moosehead Award, so am looking forward to his Moosehead show in 2017!

 

5. True Australian Patriots (MICF). Noticing in the MICF programme that three of Australiaā€™s most promising comedians had teamed up to lampoon right wing protest groups had comedy fans very excited and we were not disappointed. Anne Edmonds,Damien Power andĀ Greg LarsenĀ are all at the top of their game and gave us a riotous late night of political satire and bizarre love triangle that hit the perfect tone and bashed us right in the comedy solar plexus. True Australian Patriots

 

Happy Hogmanay from the Squirrels and hoping 2017 brings you more laughs than sorrow. X

 

Interview with Tony Martin.

By Lisa Clark

Tony Martin is a legend in Australian comedy with a huge loyal fanbase of punters and comedians alike. There are not many performers with fan websites lovingly devoted to previous work such as The Late Show (www.champagnecomedy.com), Martin/Molloy (www.martin-molloy.org) or Get This (http://www.rampantstupidity.net/) to name a few, years after the programs stopped airing. Tony is the dream guest for most podcasters and the dream interviewee for this Squirrel. He was kind enough to find one and a half hours for an interview during this yearā€™s Melbourne Fringe Festival.

If this were an old media article, the interview would be, no doubt, significantly edited, but as space isnā€™t an issue here Iā€™ve only edited it for grammar and the occasional potentially libelous content. He made me laugh throughout and mimicked most of the voices that he quotes.

Tony has been very busy recently working on Upper Middle Bogan on the ABC and is looking forward to the release in the UK of Ross Nobleā€™s new series Freewheeling for which he was a Creative Producer. When I interviewed him Tony was in the middle of the Melbourne Fringe Festival run of The Yeti (in which he performs a whole chapter from his autobiographical book Lollyscramble) his first Solo Festival show in thirteen years,Ā at the adorably kitschy Butterfly Club. His last solo festival show was A Quiet Word with Tony Martin in 2000. Though he did read out some stories from Lollyscramble in Tony Martin Reads Stuff Out at The Bella Union Bar in 2011 and has popped up in literary festivals and comedy rooms occasionally, such as his regular appearances at The Shelf over the last couple of years which always sets off waves of excitement around Melbourne. He gives some insight here of what may have shied him away from comedy festivals and sounds positive if a little nervous about his return.

Tony also gives us a lot of fabulous information about early live performances by him and comedy friends in Melbourne, for those out there keen to update Wikipedia or fan pages. He kindly offers up an idea for a government grant, documentary or possible PHD study, and confides in us his secret to a long career in comedy.
He also reveals that Ross Noble is actually a Superhero.

 

Lisa: How has the run of The Yeti been?

Tony: Itā€™s been good, what Iā€™ve learnt is, itā€™s the sort of show I shouldā€™ve done earlier in the evening. Iā€™ve done eight Oā€™Clock shows and nine Oā€™Clock shows & it goes considerably better at eight Oā€™Clock and Iā€™ve realised thatĀ in the nine Oā€™Clock shows people have had a lot more to drink and I think they are expecting it to just be normal standup. I have noticed in the later shows that there are a lot of drinks on the stage and as Iā€™m essentially performing a play I canā€™t really refer to too many things. The first two were at eight Oā€™Clock and they went really well. The next three went OK but they were really only laughing at the big jokes. Then I went back to eight Oā€™Clock last night and it was the best itā€™s ever gone. So I thought ā€˜Note to Self: only do things like this earlyā€™.

 

Lisa:Ā What is it like saying the same thing over and over? At least stand up can be tweaked but The Yeti is a form of verbatim theatre.

Tony: Iā€™ve snuck in two extra jokes, but apart from that, it is actually word for word.

Well the reason I did it really is because I had so many people asking me to do the story, whenever I do book festivals and things. You canā€™t really read it out, because itā€™s got all those character voices, so it demands to be acted. One idea was to turn it into stand up. Although I remember, years before I wrote Lollyscramble, I did actually do a version of The Yeti in standup and it absolutely died in the arse. I realised later that in order to get the story down a standup length of about three minutes I had to sort of accelerate it and smooth it out and I donā€™t think anyone believed it. People were looking at me like ā€˜No way that happened.ā€™ Whereas, when youā€™ve got fifty minutes you can leave in all the messy real life stuff. I was thinking of actually converting it to standup but so many of the laughs are in the narration, in the way the narration is so sort of flowerily worded as opposed to the rather blunt things the characters are sayingā€¦ you just learn. Franklin Ajay was in the audience last night and he was saying to me afterwards (Tony doing an impression of Franklin) ā€œYou could turn that into a kind of a sitcom like Fawlty Towers, you know all those characters living in that houseā€ And Iā€™m thinking, Yeah, but what he hadnā€™t noticed is that so many of the laughs actually come from the reaction of the narrator to the things that are said. If you stripped away the narration itā€™d be quite ordinary actually. So in the end I thought yeah; Iā€™ll just perform it exactly the way itā€™s written and because so much work had gone into editing that story for the book, I remember thinking, well, the workā€™s been done. Ā I could spend two months trying to turn it into a more standuppy show but Ā at the end of that thereā€™d be as much work as went into the actual writing of that story or the whittling down really of that material. Theyā€™re very hard stories toā€¦

When you write you basically take everything you can remember and then you just throw it on the floor and go ā€œRight, is there a story in all of this or is just a bunch of anecdotes? What is the difference between an anecdote and a story?ā€ And of course because it is something that was said twenty years ago, your memory only remembers odd things. Itā€™s funny but when you ask someone to describe ā€˜OK you lived in a house twenty years ago, what do you remember of that year?ā€™ you wonā€™t remember everything in order, youā€™ll remember really odd, particular things, you will have forgotten months of mundane activity. So itā€™s a very odd series of building blocks to try to construct a story from, as opposed to if you were writing a fictional story about some people living in a house. Youā€™d go ā€˜Well I need a bit so I can get from there to there, I need a proper ending. Whereas those biographical stories are ones where youā€™ve got to make a story from the only available parts which are the bits you can remember.

Ā 

Lisa: There is so much information in your stories, we get some evidence of your hoarding of keepsakes at the end of The Yeti, but do you keep aĀ diary at all?

Tony: I donā€™t now, itā€™s a pain in the arse. I just did this big tour around England with Ross Noble and weā€™re working 12 ā€“ 16 hour days and the last thing you want to do at the end of the day is write a diary, but because I was in England, I actually made myself write a diary every night, sometimes for two and a half hours

Lisa: Wow

Tony: So Iā€™ve only started doing that lately, but I donā€™t really keep a diary but Iā€™ve always kept notes of things people say, because what Iā€™ve discovered is that someone says something funny in a conversation, even if itā€™s hilarious, when you come to tell someone three days later, youā€™ve usually changed the wording, youā€™ve usually forgotten the wording or youā€™ve often tidied it up and itā€™s not as funny. So when I hear someone say something funny I try and write it down exactly the way they said it. Like in that story from The Yeti when Gunter sayā€™s ā€˜SO BLARDY FLARSH DEM TURTS!ā€™ he doesnā€™t say ā€˜So flush them bloody turdsā€™ the way you would say it, he says ā€˜So Blardy Flarsh dem Turts!ā€™ The bloody is in the wrong place in the sentence and but itā€™s more like something someone would say. So I do try with phrases and things, Iā€™ve always kept quite detailed notes. Itā€™s not so much keeping notes, itā€™s just that when something funny happensā€¦.like all the stories in those books involving my family when I was growing up, theyā€™re stories thatā€™ve been going round for years in our family. Weā€™ve all told those stories. Like when Skippy came to our town and fireworks night. They are quite well known in my circle.

 

Lisa: I loved your show at The Shelf, Do you think you could turn yourĀ slide nightĀ into a show?

Tony: Laughs ā€˜Iā€™ve had a few people say that to me and Iā€™ve never considered it. Itā€™s been so long since I did a standup show and I do want to do another one at some point that it sort of feels like cheating to have pictures. It feels lazy almost. But I notice that a lot of standups now have Dave Gorman style PowerPoint presentations. That was fun because a lot of the jokes had already been written on Twitter. In fact I think pretty much all of those photos Iā€™d already shown on my twitter. So I had a lot of material already and I remember driving in thinking ā€œGee, if everyone there follows me on Twitterā€¦but it seems like no one there didā€

Lisa: Well we were laughing! Because it was funny anyway and it was a bit different and more detailed

Tony: I think you could make a show out of it, I liked the way that Adam Richard was just moving onto the next one real quick and you could have one picture and one joke and then go straight on to the next one. I thought, thatā€™s interesting, Iā€™d love to do a show like that where you flip through a lot of pictures really quickly. I dunno, Hammoā€™s (Justin Hamilton) keen for me to a bit more of that. I try and do something every time he does a series and I try to make most of them. Itā€™s often not planned he just says (starts to do Justinā€™s voice) ā€˜Why donā€™t you come down?ā€™ and it depends if Iā€™m working or not, or if Iā€™ve got something to do. I like the way he tries never to repeat anything on those nights. So I donā€™t think Iā€™ve ever done the same thing twice, Iā€™ve done standup spots, Iā€™ve read out articles of mine. I did one where I read out a lot of phoney, angry letters to the editor Iā€™d written and Iā€™ve done a slide show. So I try and do something different every time. What I really wanted to do and Damnit, Paul F Tompkins beat me to it. I wanted to spend a lot of money and have a costume made of that bloke in Boardwalk Empire with half his face missing. Richard Harrow (played by Jack Huston) lost half his face in WW1, so he wears a tin mask over half his face and itā€™s a really fun voice to do. It would cost a fortune but I was thinking of having a full Richard Harrow costume made for just a one off appearance at The Shelf and then Damnit Tompkins beat me to it. He started doing it on the Comedy Bang! Bang! podcast and then heā€™s done a thing for Funny or Die where heā€™s wearing the full gear. So, canā€™t really do that now. Damn you Tompkins!

 

Lisa: I wanted to ask you about youā€™re early live Standup experience because there is nothing much online, itā€™s really hard to find out about old live comedy performances. There are no old records kept.

Tony: I remember the first I ever heard about the Internet was on the front cover of Time magazine in 1994 and then I think I got the Internet in 1996. Already there was comedy nerd stuff on there, but thereā€™s a real gap. You get comedians now whoā€™ve done five gigs and already all of them are on You Tube. Whereas thereā€™s this incredible gap of Melbourne comedy thatā€™s not been preserved. Iā€™ve been trying for years for somebody to do something with all the Espy Comedy videos. I started doing comedy there, (at The Esplanade Hotel in St Kilda) it rather notoriously ran for one month shy of ten years when Trev Hoare, the man that ran it was ousted in a rather ugly coup. There should be a documentary about it. Peter Grace, who produced Martin/Molloy, used to be the kind of tech at the Espy and he had a camera set up. I donā€™t think it was recording the proper sound, like through the microphone or anything. Trev Hoare used to sit in his office and behind him was a huge wall of VHS tapes. It was just thousands and thousands of hours. They ran a camera across everything for years. I think someone told me they didnā€™t get the first two or three years but Gracie told me it was something like two thousand video tapes and it would require a huge effort for someone to transfer them and go through them all. Itā€™s like a government grant should be given for someone to try and corral all that material. There could well be a great documentary in it and I know there are quite a lot of legendary Anthony Morgan and Greg Fleet things there; itā€™s just too big a job. I see Trev Hoare every five years I go ā€œWhatā€™s happened to all those tapes?ā€ and he goes (Does the voice) ā€œAw Iā€™ve still got the tapes Toneā€ but that would fill in a gap if someone could get into all that material.

I started out doing standup at The Gershwin Room (in the Esplanade Hotel) when they did this brilliant thing called The Delivery Room. It started as weekly and only ran for five months. No-one can actually pin down the date, but I know I was on at the third one. Iā€™ve got it written down somewhere, it was early December 1990. It mustā€™ve started around November 1990 and it went through to Comedy Festival 1991, when they did a great show called Gift from the Gobs. Which thereā€™s actually an album of. That was the famous Delivery Room, with The Rope, where they had the rope hanging from the ceiling and you couldnā€™t do old material, youā€™d have to go over and hold the rope. People would yell out ā€˜Ropeā€™ if they recognised an old joke.

Lisa: I remember that and I saw a show in Edinburgh a few years ago that did that too.

Tony: Yeah, because thatā€™s become quite famous and often overseas comedians that would come on Get This would say ā€˜Iā€™ve heard about the rope thing you used to do hereā€™. So I think the rope thing they did in Edinburgh is probably copied from the Espy Comedy one.

What was great about those five months is I just remember so much material was generated. It was a new three and a half hour show every week. People werenā€™t just writing standup, they were writing sketches and there was a dance troupe that did this terrible choreography and Anthony Morgan wrote this brilliant news report every week. Pretty much The Melbourne comedy scene, which was of course much, much smaller in the 90s was fuelled for about four years by the material that was created in those five months. Then, after that Espy Comedy continued through the 90s but they didnā€™t have the Rope policy after that.

Lisa: There is nothing on Wikipedia about all of this.

Tony: Wikipedia is great in general but once a year Iā€™ll go have a look at my page and itā€™s riddled with inaccuracies. Not that I care, ā€˜cause I know that if someone fixes it, a week later my name will be Penis again.

Lisa: So did you do any Festival shows as such?

Tony: Goshā€¦ Iā€™ve done four Comedy Festival shows but Iā€™ve only done one on my own. The first one I did was with the D-Generation in 1991. We did a show at Le Joke called Midnight Shenanigans. That was quite a famous show at the time. Have you ever been to Le Joke?

Lisa: Yes, but I didnā€™t see that, I actually saw The D-genā€™s very first show downstairs at The Last Laugh in 1984

Tony: Would that have been ā€œLetā€™s Talk Backwardsā€?

Lisa: Yes, I think so!

Tony: Yes thatā€™s the one that most of them came from, then Magda and others were in the next years one called Too Cool for Sandals. We did a show, that was with everyone from The Late Show series one, so not Judith, and then John Harrison, who was in Letā€™s Talk Backwards, we dragged him away from his proper job and we did a show at Le Joke. Le Joke was upstairs at the Last Laugh. I think it held about 120 people but it was really small. It was the most expensive show, I think we were paid about $500 a week to do the show and we spent thousands on really elaborate props and we had a cart system in the days before laptops and we had TV monitors and we had Santo the Magnificent. His disappearing cabinet had to be dragged up the back steps. People would come along and couldnā€™t believe how elaborate it was in this tiny room. So that was the first Comedy Festival show I did. Then I did one the following year in ā€™92, I did one with Mick Molloy, Greg Fleet and Matt Quattermaine, called The Show with No Name at Le Joke. I canā€™t remember a lot about that but it opened with a musical version of Cape Fear and it closed with us singing the Daniel Boon theme song but we changed the words to Jesus Christ. So it was ā€˜Jesus Christ was a manā€™. There was occasionally boos for that.

Then we did The Late Show and in 1994 I did a Comedy Festival show at the National Theatre, ā€˜cause that was when we were quite huge. Me and Mick & Judith Lucy did a show called Martin, Molloy & Lucy in fact. I didnā€™t do standup when we did Martin/Molloy and then I went all the way back.

What happens with me is that I donā€™t do standup for a few of years and then itā€™s like going back to being a tryout all over again, so I went to Edinburgh with Judith. I probably would never have done standup again after Martin/Molloy ā€˜cause, four years is a long time in Standup. While I was doing Martin/Molloy all these new people like Dave Hughes had come along and suddenly there was massive amounts of comics around so I was a bit intimidated. Then Judith Lucy did this great thing, she was going to Edinburgh to do her show called ā€˜The Showā€™ and I think she had a one and a half hour slot but the show was only seventy minutes, so she said to me ā€˜Why donā€™t you do twenty minutes at the top, I wonā€™t put you on the posterā€™. It was quite rare for someone to have a support act in their festival show in Edinburgh. So I got to go up and do twenty minutes every night supporting her and it wasnā€™t advertised and no-one knew who I was which was great, it meant that the material was judged on the material and I started to build up a completely new act.

Then I did a show called A Quiet Word with Tony Martin which is nothing to do with the TV show that I did. That was in the year 2000 and that was the first solo Comedy Festival show that I did and that was actually nominated for The Barry Award. I remember Fleety (Greg Fleet) and Alan Brough were nominated as well that year for something called Interrogation but The Boosh won as well they should. But I havenā€™t done a show since then really which was fourteen years ago.

I did standup for about four or five years in the early nineties and then didnā€™t do it again ā€˜til what I just described. I remember there was quite an uglyā€¦It was quite interesting when I did that Quiet Word show because there was a notorious rock journalist from Britain, I think he wrote a book about Nirvana. He Ā reviewed comedy festival shows for The Age that year and he wrote a really nasty review claiming my show was racist. I had to actually phone him up and ask him ā€˜What was the racist bit?ā€™ and it was a fraction of a quote, an innocuous bit where I quoted word for word a conversation Iā€™d had with this Scotsman (and in fact Iā€™m technically Scottish, because my family are from Scotland) but it got into the papers that I was doing this racist show, although it didnā€™t explain what.

I always remember going to see my blood specialist who was Egyptian and he was coming into the room with my file to basically tell me if I was going to die or not, so youā€™re waiting for that information, and without looking up from his clipboard he just goes Ā ā€˜My ahhh, my receptionist tells me youā€™re doing a racist showā€™.Ā 

Heā€™s doing the Egyptian accent and we laugh despite ourselves.

So it was quite ugly, because the reviewer was writing for both The Age and Inpress, so I had The Age and the Inpress calling me racist and yet at the same time I was also nominated for The Barry Award, so it was an odd experience and I didnā€™t do standup for a few years after that.

Iā€™ve mentioned Trev Hoare before, cause Iā€™m such a fan of his, but he started up a room in Milanoā€™s Tavern Sandringham do you remember that?

Lisa: No!

Tony: Every now and then heā€™ll just start a comedy room in a bizarre place. He was the one who did comedy at Young & Jacksons a few years ago on Monday nights.

Lisa: I remember that, I went to that

Tony: I used to go there and do spots. What was great about Milanos was that it was just out of town enough that there were never any comics in the audience. There would often be only twenty five people in the audience but it was a really good place to try out new material and if it went badly no-one would ever hear about it. So I think I went there every night for months and that was again like going all the way back to the beginning and starting all over again.

Lisa: Iā€™ve heard this from another comedian; do you find it a bit intimidating sometimes having the comedians in the room, like they used to be up the back at The Prince Pat?

Tony: Well, it depends how many there are. Up the back of The Prince Pat was fine, because then youā€™d have, maybe 200 punters as well, but I remember (Iā€™m not going to name any rooms) but I remember there was a couple of rooms that I used to go to in the early noughties where there would be forty people in the room and twenty of them would be comedians. Of course thereā€™s no tougher audience than comedians for comedy. So Iā€™d go ā€˜I donā€™t want to go try out new stuff with twenty comedians thereā€™.

 

Lisa: I heard that you put up Internet Movie Data Base pages for obscure Aussie TV comedies that didnā€™t have their own page?

Tony: Well mainly New Zealand movies. I think Karl Chandler, seems obsessed with this, but in fact most of my IMBD work has been New Zealand movies. When the Internet started the IMDB only had two New Zealand movies in it and I had a project in the nineties when I first got the Internet to try and get every single New Zealand movie on it, which is something like four hundred and fifty, so it took me three and a half years and I did it.

Lisa:Well done.

Tony: So when I finished I started adding obscure Australian comedy shows like Brass Monkey and things like that.

Lisa: Itā€™s obvious that you love movies but I suspect you have a particular, possibly goulish love for reallyĀ bad/trashy films.Ā Is that true, or do you just love movies in general?

Tony: Yeah, well, I like good and bad movies. I remember that when I was in Edinburgh, I was watching so much comedy and so much great comedy that eventually you go ā€˜Letā€™s go and see some BAD comedyā€™.

 

Lisa: I was impressed that you spent your money from Martin/Molloy toĀ make your own films.

Tony: It was always something we used to talk about. It was something we used to do on the breakfast show. It all came about because we did these pilots for The Late Show in 1990 and we went out to the car park with home video equipment, which no-one ever did, and shot sketches. We shot test sketches, we thought, weā€™ll film it on home video and if theyā€™re any good and the show gets up weā€™ll re-film them again properly. But there was just some kind of quality to these crappily low budget, shot on home video in a car park sketches, they looked like shit, but they had this life to them! What we found is that, when we were doing sketches on the D-Generation they would spend so long lighting them and they would do eight or nine takes and theyā€™d use take nine because that was the one where the camera moves were perfect but it was probably the one where the actors were exhausted and not funny. Whereas when we shot the stuff on home video we went aw well letā€™s just use the takes where itā€™s funny. Who cares if it looks like shit.

That was such a lesson to us, so when we did The Late Show on TV we spent literally hundreds of thousands of dollars of our own money shooting our own sketches and films and post producing them ourselves. Thatā€™s how Frontline came about, thatā€™s how they ended up being able to direct Frontline themselves on really small cameras.

Lisa: Some of those Late Show sketches still stand up today on line

Tony: So I thought well thatā€™s a really good lesson, investing in yourself. You know, we were young, we didnā€™t have any children. Occasionally Iā€™ll go, maybe I shouldā€™ve hung onto some of that money. With the film Bad Eggs, if I hadnā€™t invested my own money I donā€™t think I wouldā€™ve been allowed to direct that myself. I didnā€™t have any directing credits up to that point, apart from doing sketches on The Late Show and the Mick Molloy Show. Yeah, I put three hundred grand into that film and it sort of opened doors. I think the head of Village Roadshow said ā€˜Woah weā€™ve never had someone offering to put their own money into their filmā€™. Itā€™s a clichĆ© but itā€™s one you hear all the time, ā€œThe first rule of the film industry is never put your own money in because youā€™ll never see it againā€. Although Bad Eggs has actually slowly but surely finally recouped all its money. Of that three hundred grand I think Iā€™ve made about fifty grand of it back and I wasnā€™t expecting to see any of it, so thatā€™s been a bonus.

Lisa: Well I liked it

Tony: Itā€™s not for everybody, that film, but it does have a following. It was very popular in Germany, like David Hasselhoffā€™s music. It got rave reviews in Germany where it was known as Mit vollem Einsatz! which means ā€˜With Extreme Forceā€™. [though literally translates as With Full Use]

 

Lisa: I read how hard you worked onĀ Martin MolloyĀ ā€“ basically from the moment you woke til going to bed, was it the same with Get This?

Tony: It was and possibly Get This even more so. Well we donā€™t have writers or anything. With Get This because I was paying everyone, (my company was making that show), I felt I wasnā€™t paying Richard and Ed enough to demand that they give their entire lives over to the show. So I was the one writing the sketches for that showā€¦oh no no, thatā€™s not fair! Because Richard and Ed would often write their own sketches, but not everyday. Martin/Molloy was very scripted, although now, ā€˜cause weā€™ve said that so much in interviews, I think people think that everything was scripted. Obviously when we were talking to callers or interviewing people that wasnā€™t scripted, and some of the mucking around in the second hour obviously wasnā€™t scripted. That whole first hour where we would do those long rants and things; that was all written.

For Martin/Molloy weā€™d get in at 10am and work all day ā€˜til 4 and then the show would go from 4 ā€“ 6pm then Iā€™d go home and write ā€˜til, midnight and youā€™d be up first thing reading the papers. Youā€™d have to read all the papers, there wasnā€™t the online aggregate, where the whittling was done for you. It was just a huge amount of work and the production wasā€¦ now you can build an elaborate sketch quite quickly on a computer, but computers where much more primitive in the 1990s. So Vicki Marr who was the Matt Dower of Martin/Molloy would spend hours on it, I remember being there ā€˜til midnight some times. Mick putting down a sketch that probably only went for two minutes fifteen and was probably only ever played twice. That was all kind of part of what we were trying to do.

We werenā€™t interested in being ā€˜radio personalitiesā€™, thatā€™s not why we were doing the show. We just wanted to do a comedy show. We wanted to do a radio show that was like a TV show where you wouldnā€™t want to miss any of it. As opposed to a radio show that goes for three hours but you know ā€˜I hear about twenty minutes of itā€™. Weā€™re going No No, we want people to listen to the whole thing like they would watch a TV show. So that was our rather pompous sort of declaration. The standard we set for ourselves.

Some of it sounded a bit stilted because we were sitting there reading off spirax books, but because there was nothing else like it, the novelty got us through a lot of the time. Whereas by the time we got round to Get This that style, that read out style had become a bit out of fashion, so I would write things, but I would try to do them from memory or use point form lists so that it wouldnā€™t sound as stilted. There was still just as much, or even more work that went into Get This as Martin/Molloy.

 

Lisa: Do you think youā€™re a bit of a workaholic?

Tony: Oh, not really. I think of myself as quite lazy. Iā€™ll try and get out of work whenever I can. Itā€™s just fear, with radio itā€™s just this beast that eats up every idea that youā€™ve ever had. So you put in a really big dayā€™s work then you go home and youā€™re back to zero and you go, right whatā€™ve we got for tomorrow? You want it to be good, soooā€¦. but itā€™s not through any desire to be a workaholic. Itā€™s just that, this is how much work you have to do to make a show like that any good.

Lisa: Not everybody would say that.

Tony: Well Iā€™m not saying itā€™s the only way to do a radio show. I mean someone like Marty Sheargold, (now Iā€™m sure Marty does a lot of preparation) heā€™s got the genius of sounding like itā€™s all coming off the top of his head. A show thatā€™s had a lot of work put into it can often sound like that and itā€™s hard to listen to, whereas radio, especially FM radio is at its best when itā€™s relaxed casual and you just go ā€˜Well hereā€™s something I found in the paperā€™. The problem is that the radio year is a long year and by August most people are fucked. So if you can think of a way to do a show where you donā€™t have to kill yourself every day, well Done!

 

Lisa: Do you think you might do another stint on radio one day, maybe even the ABC?

Tony: I donā€™t know if I really fit in on The ABC. They have a bizarre rule where they only have one host and so they have a man or woman in a room talking to themselves. Whereas the kind of radio Iā€™ve always done is talking to an actual person.

 

How has working on 3RRR been?

Itā€™s great! Obviously youā€™re not being paid, itā€™s volunteer radio, but I remember after the sort of quite unpleasant last few months of Get This, I remember going and doing shifts with Tony Wilson and talking quite uninhibitedly for long amounts of time about obscure things. Heā€™d go to a song and the door would burst open and Mick James the station manager would come in and Iā€™d think ā€˜awwā€¦ weā€™re going to cop it!ā€™ and heā€™d go ā€˜GREAT! Do more of THAT!ā€™ So that was great, but you canā€™t make a living, although thatā€™s not fair, I think the Breakfasters get paid a very small amount of money to do that show but really itā€™s all volunteer radio and I love doing it but I canā€™t do it full time.

Lisa: Is there any chance you might do some more episodes of ā€˜A Quite Word Withā€™ on the ABC? Are there more people youā€™d like to interview?

Tony: We did pitch a third series, there were budget cuts at the ABC and they didnā€™t want to do another series of that. There were hundreds of people I wouldā€™ve liked to talk to but we did two series of it and for the second series I got to go to England which was quite exciting, though we were only there for four days. We got Rob Brydon and Richard E Grant and a few people who we wouldnā€™t have got if weā€™d just waited here for people to come. You donā€™t get as many people coming out here anymore, unless thereā€™s a festival on and obviously youā€™ll get some comedians. It was a very cheap show really, it was mostly just shot in a bar. Iā€™d love to do some more. Iā€™ve often thought of bringing it back just as a podcast, but finding the timeā€¦

Lisa: I donā€™t know if you can make much money out of podcasts either

Tony: There are so many podcasts and people are always saying ā€˜Why donā€™t you have a podcastā€™ but it would be like a radio show. It would take up so much of my time. I have to say, we already have some good ones, I mean Justin Hamilton does a great one [three in fact, but I think Tony is referring to Can You Take This Photo Please?] and The Little Dum Dum Club and I love Green Guide Letters. We have some really good comedy podcasts in this town. Iā€™m not sure if we need another one. I ran this website called The Scriveners Fancy for just over two years and that started out as a hobby while I was out of work. It was only one day a week but by the end of it, it was three days, sometimes four days a week work because I was having to be like an editor of a newspaper and try and call up people and beg them to write me something for free. That was great when I had time to do it, but eventually I just couldnā€™t keep going because I had to go and do some actual work. I do quite like the idea of doing a podcast at some point but trying not to just doā€¦ Itā€™s like every single comedian in the world has a podcast where they interview every single other comedian in the world. Itā€™s what I feel like the worldā€™s podcasting is and I think, do I really need to add to that? I donā€™t know, if I think I can think of a slightly different way of doing it, may be.

 

Lisa: So what about this show you are doing with Ross Noble in the UK Called Freewheeling? (starting on Oct 29th on Dave). How did it come about?

Tony: I just got an email from him. Iā€™ve known Ross for quite a while, well, Iā€™ve been a fan of his since 1999 when I saw him in Edinburgh and he was the talk of Edinburgh in that year. I donā€™t think he was even nominated for the Perrier, but he was all everyone was talking about everywhere you went ā€˜Have you seen this amazing guyā€™. Then he started coming on Get This and he was a huge fan of Get This

Lisa: He was brilliant on it.

Tony: When you watch that show he made in Australia in 2007, though it didnā€™t get shown ā€˜til a few years later, Ross Nobleā€™s Australian Trip. He said whenever you see him riding his motorbike through the outback, heā€™s listening to Get This on his headphones. So he was quite the fan. He was almost like a fourth cast member, in a way, sometimes. Then he did A Quiet Word with me, then I had a really good reaction from a podcast I did with him on the ABCā€™s website. Then earlier this year I got an email from him out of nowhere (in Rossā€™s voice) ā€˜Do you want to come and spend Summer chasing me ā€˜round England?ā€™ It sounded great. I was picturing Brideshead Revisited. Then a week before I went over Iā€™m calling up the production office and theyā€™re telling me that itā€™s the coldest recorded Summer since records began in 1813. It was pretty full on, it was a great thing to do but it was really strange because there were no other Australians there. It was just me and all these English crew members chasing Ross around the country for a few months in a van. In three vans in fact. He was on a motorbike and there were fourteen of us in three vans. My official role was called Creative Producer and I had to think upā€¦ well it was whittling down the tweets more than anything. Ross would tweet ā€˜What should I do here?ā€™ and there would literally be about 200 tweets in thirty seconds. So I would go through them and say ā€˜What if we did this?ā€™ and ā€˜You could go thereā€™ and ā€˜We could do something like that.ā€™

Ross and I wrote a huge amount of material, because one of the original ideas for the show was that in addition to us following him around England, the format of the show would be like a send up of travel shows, because there are so many of them. So we wrote all these sketches and phony history reports and these scenes where the narrator version of Ross was arguing with the real Ross. So we wrote a huge amount of material but in the end we didnā€™t use any of it because the stuff with him just following the tweets was so great and there was so much of it. Itā€™s only a six hour series and we probably shot enough material for three times that. So in the end all the written stuff has been stockpiled and Ross is talking about doing another series, where we just use the written stuff. So Iā€™m possibly going back to do another show which will be quite different.

Lisa: Thatā€™s cool.

Tony: Heā€™s brilliant to work with. I spent all day and night with him, ā€˜cause he doesnā€™t sleep, thereā€™s no off switch. I would see him every day and you get to see how he operates up close. Heā€™s not cheating, he is literally making it up as he goes along!

Lisa: Wow, so after all that time together you kept enjoying working with him and want to work with him again?

Tony: Oh yeah, heā€™s like a kind of a superhero really, what he can actually do. We would have had two hours sleep and weā€™d be in some dreary, depressing carpark in Manchester. Itā€™s pissing with rain and no-oneā€™s turned up and thereā€™s just a sign in the corner and Noble would go over and somehow turn that sign into five minutes of comedy gold. Every time I thought ā€˜we are just going to get nothing out of thisā€™, he would just pull it out of his mind. We were in a Services, they call it a Services, it was like a 7/11 / service station and itā€™s freezing cold and we didnā€™t have anything to do and there was a sign up for some charity that Terry Wogan does to help children in need and the logo is a teddy bear with an eye missing and heā€™s got a bandage over one eye and I remember Ross doing a three minute monologue about that picture. He was saying (does Rossā€™s voice) ā€œYouā€™d think after twenty years Terry Wogan wouldā€™ve done something about that poor little bearā€™s eyeā€. The crew was just crying with laughter. So that was just potentially three minutes of a forty-five minute episode, just belted off there.

We used to call it ā€˜Golden Minutesā€™. When we started, the production company was quite nervous wondering ā€˜What if you donā€™t get any Tweets? Or what if you get there and we canā€™t think of anything funny? Weā€™ve got to do an episode a week and how are you going to fill the time?ā€™ And of course Noble would just go up to a sign and rant on and weā€™d all look at each other and someone would say ā€˜Golden Minutes!ā€™ The aim was we had to get something like nine minutes of finished show a day. On the first day we were worried about how much usable footage we had, because there was a lot of driving, weā€™d be driving to Cardiff for four hours and so thereā€™s four hours weā€™re not filming. Then on the second day we got something like fifty-eight minutes of usable footage in one day. So yeah, his golden minutes.

I donā€™t know what the end result will be, I havenā€™t seen the final shows and I donā€™t knowā€¦ I assume thereā€™ll be a DVD and I assume theyā€™ll have time to edit some of that extra stuff for the DVD, ā€˜cause Ross always does really chockers DVDs.

Lisa: Like yourself

Tony: Yeah, but heā€™s got one out called Headspace Cowboy, itā€™s got six separate shows on it! Some people havenā€™t done six DVDs ever! Heā€™s done six shows on one DVD, so Iā€™m hoping there will be a good DVD of this series.

 

Lisa: Do you think itā€™ll come to Australia at all?

Tony: Youā€™d think so, heā€™s really popular here, people almost think of him as Australian.

Lisa: He lived here

Tony: Yeah, he lived here until the bushfires.

Lisa: Yeah that was awful

Tony: I know. Ross Nobleā€™s Australian Trip was on TEN, although thatā€™s got nothing to do with this, I donā€™t know if that means theyā€™ll show it. It was shown kind of rather late at night if I remember. The thing about that show, by the way, is that it was never going to be a TV show.

Lisa: Oh

Tony: It wasnā€™t actually a series when they were making it. Ross was just on a Tour and Pete Callow, his brilliant director who goes everywhere with Ross, said ā€˜Why donā€™t we just film some stuff to put on the DVD?ā€™ They were only filming for about twenty minutes a day, Ross told me, on that Australian trip, because he had shows to do and to get to. Then they got to the end and said, maybe weā€™ve got enough here for a TV series. I love that show, but it was not intended to be a show when they made it. The main difference between that one and Freewheeling is that about a quarter of Ross Nobleā€™s Australian Trip was footage from his live shows, whereas thereā€™s none of that in Freewheeling, because we werenā€™t on a tour. That was probably the main reason I was brought over, because I think Ross thought well hang on, Iā€™ve got to do this and Iā€™m not going to be able to cut to me doing jokes on stage, so what are we going to have instead? So we were going to write all these sketches which we did but in the end there wasnā€™t a great deal of need for them.

 

Lisa: About The Yeti, do you think youā€™ll tour it?

Tony: Well you can do a fifty minute show during a Festival but outside of a Festival itā€™s a bit of a rip-off. Do know what I mean? If you are on tour you really should do ninety minutes.

Lisa: Yeah I interviewed Alan Davies recently and he said you need a good ninety minutes

Tony: Yeah well, if youā€™re playing big theatres like he does, well, maybe two hours or something. But I wouldnā€™t do this in big theatres, I couldnā€™t fill big theatres but also itā€™s not really a show thatā€¦

Lisa: Itā€™s an intimate show

Tony: Yeah, itā€™s a small show, and up until opening night I had no idea if this would even work at all, so Iā€™m doing extra shows at the Lithuanian club which holds 220 people and Iā€™m actually a bit skeptical as to whether it will work in a room that size but itā€™ll be a good experiment and if it works [according to those who were there it did work] Ā maybe Iā€™ll do the same thing with a second story and maybe Iā€™ll tour that. Thatā€™s one idea. I also want to get back to just doing standup, and get back on the road doing that.

But because Iā€™ve been working on Upper Middle Boganā€¦

Lisa: Which is great!

Tony: Weā€™re waiting to see if weā€™ll get a second series of that, so Iā€™m in this weird limbo where Iā€™m waiting to hear if Iā€™m doing another show with Ross and Iā€™m waiting to hear whether thereā€™s going to be any more Bogan so I canā€™t really make any plans at this point.

Itā€™s good to be working, thatā€™s what I say.

Lisa: Thatā€™s what Squirrel Comedy is all about, we love to see comedians in work, itā€™s good.

Tony: Well the secret isā€¦I turn fifty next year and to keep working at this age, the key isā€¦ the only bit of advice I ever give young comedians isā€¦. just learn to do as many different things as you can, because when one thing ends Iā€™ve always got another different thing I can do.

Ā You can buy Tony Martinā€™s books at his minimalist website

http://tonymartinthings.com/

Hereā€™s the Freewheeling trailer from the comedy channel called ā€˜Daveā€™ in the UK. Freewheeling premiers in the UK on Tuesday 29th October Ā at 10pm

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sjoON9Ds8rs&feature=youtu.be

Pic thanks to smh.com.au