1 – You are (a) Male or (b) Female

Do you fall into one of these two groups?  If so, there will be much you’ll relate to in Yianni’s show. Of course, we live in post-gender 2017 so you may not be sure.  If unsure, merely locate your birth certificate or passport.  If neither of these are available, just check which toilet you usually use.  Oh, wait, maybe don’t do that.  Either way, book tickets immediately.

2 – You’ve been gender judged

Are you a lippy woman (one who speaks), a bit of a poof (thoughtful), bossy (assertive), a poof (teetotal), a lesbian (rejected a man’s advances), a poof (didn’t want to go to the strip club), a ball breaker (assertive), a poof (cried at something) or hysterical (assertive)?  Come along and see society’s double standards eviscerated for an hour.

3 – You think the AFLW is a great idea

If you’re the sort of open minded progressive who nodded knowingly, turned up to (and was possibly turned away from) Optus Oval for the first match and has a Daisy Pearce tattoo taking pride of place amongst your ‘woke as fuck’ sleeve, you’ll be sure to find many of your opinions validated at 8:30pm daily (not Wednesdays, 7:30pm on Sundays) at Trades Hall.

4 – You think the AFLW is a terrible idea.

If you’re the sort of retrograde traditionalist who tutted angrily, watched the first match on Channel 7 just to be able to call it ‘Year 9 standard rubbish’ and has a Dane Swan tattoo taking pride of place amongst your ‘political correctness gone mad’ sleeve, you’ll be sure to find your worldview challenged at 8:30pm daily (not Wednesdays, 7:30pm on Sundays) at Trades Hall.

5 – To find out why pink used to be a boy’s colour.

Pink as recently as the 1920s was considered a boy’s colour.  But the idea of gendered colours is ridiculous.  ‘Pink’ or ‘Blue’ is when a specific amount of light is reflected and absorbed by a surface.  It can’t mean anything except what we make it mean.  Which means that we can change it.  If you’re sick of young girls invisibly guided into the servitude of princess and fairydom, young boys having dancing ‘manned’ out of them and toy stores gender segregated like a 1950s Alabama bus come along and Rosa Parks your bum on a seat.

Yianni Agisilaou performs The Un-Pinchable Pink Pen at Trades Hall.

For tickets and more information see the Melbourne International Comedy Festival website:

Comedians’ Cinema Club

By Ron Bingham
comedians cinema club
It’s here at the festival again. The maddest silliest most anarchic group of randon comedians acting out a cinematic blockbuster that they, and possibly you, haven’t seen. Last year I saw Aliens and Back To The Future II. This time I was lucky enough to see a film that I had not seen on the big screen (nor, apparently, had the cast or most of the audience – it appears to have been popular only with people without a sense of humour?), AVATAR.

The board out the front of the venue told us that the cast for today consisted of Yianni Agisiliaou, Kai Humphries, Milo McCabe, Steve Bugeja, Stephen Bailey, Elf Lyons and Will Seaward. I know Elf hadn’t turned up (having seen her an hour earlier) and someone else was a no-show as there were only five “stars”. I’d try and give the plot of the film but, if you’ve seen it, you know it better than I do and, if you haven’t, you wouldn’t believe me…. although they kept referring to Fern Gully and there was something about plugging hair into trees and jumping onto flying lizards and floating rocks. the cast dragged a couple of young lads out of the front row (yes the audience WILL be part of the action, so get your acting boots on or hide down the back) to play their avatars. We had to be trees and make jungle noises and stuff, there was a lot of running round the little room and much hilarity was had by all.

If you get a chance to see it, or you would like to see one of your favourite films butchered beyond belief by a bunch of (slightly tipsy) comedians, then this is the choice you have for the rest of the festival:

21st Lord of the Rings trilogy
22nd Hunchback of Notre Dame
23rd Cool Runnings
24th Silence of the Lambs
25th From Dusk ’til Dawn
26th Free Willy
27th Interview with a Vampire
29th Saving Private Ryan
30th The Wizard of Oz.