Jennifer Wong Laughable: The One-Liner Show

1, One-liners are short. Perfect if you’ve got a short attention Spanish is a romance language.

2. One-liners are packed with surprises. Great for those who love not being able to predict how each joke will Sasketchewan.

3. One-liners are concise. Wow, I think this is the first time I’ve ever used the word ‘concise’ without having to say ‘Oxford English Dictionary’ right after it. That means a lot.

4. One-liners are full of wordplay. Just Sasketchewanybody.

5. The show is Laughable.

Jennifer Wong Laughable: The One-Liner Show is on at the Forum Theatre – Ladies Lounge

This is my show: http://www.comedyfestival.com.au/2014/season/shows/laughable-the-one-liner-show-jennifer-wong


5 Good Reasons to see That Sexy Show

1) Do you think Cosmo’s sex advice is socially irresponsible and dangerous? So do the (sane) humans of That Sexy Show! Go and watch Cosmo sex tips debunked right before your very (horrified) eyes! (This may or may not involve audience participation and often gets physical.)

2) They feature delicious pornstars and sexperts alongside some of Melbourne’s best tasting comedians! (Check Facebook for the linep – facebook.com/ThatSexyShow). Previous guests include Luke McGregor (Dirty Laundry Live, Nova FM, Time Of Our Lives), Catherine Deveny, Tom Ward (Please Like Me), Aeryn Walker (Game of Thrones) and this time round they’ll be joined by the likes of Fiona Patten – leader of the Australian Sex Party and pop-music comedy duo Die Roten Punkte.

3) You are guaranteed to learn something. Last time all in attendance became more knowledgeable about the pleasure (and seemingly lack of pleasure) derived from docking.*

*Docking; The act of placing the head of ones penis inside the foreskin of another’s penis.
Use it in a sentence? David and Patrick enjoyed docking immensely because of Patty’s stretchy foreskin.

4) The absolutely babin’ Geraldine Hickey (Triple M, The Librarians) is in it, joined by host and sex geek babe Sarah Jane and Adam Knox (Raw National Finalist) who are pretty good value too.

5) It’s central and on late, so you can fit it around anything else you’re seeing (The Butterfly Club, 5 Carson Pl, 10:30pm-midnight every Thursday of the festival)

Bonus: 
6) Cause you’re a kinky mother fucked (yay for you!) and you like watching awkward porn of a girl fucking a man in a panda suit just so that you can look at all the awkward looks on everyone else’s faces.
That Sexy Show is on Thursday nights at the very sexy Butterfly Club.

5 Good Reasons to see Joe Bone’s Bane Trilogy

1. If you’re on a diet, it’s a great way to not think about food for an hour.

2. You’ll get to glance around the room and hear someone else’s weird over exuberant laugh.

3. If you’re attempting a charity fundraiser to “Not laugh for one year”, it’ll be an interesting test of your mental strength. But you’ll probably be fine.

4. It’s won loads of awards and stuff, and has a Brazilian translation running in Rio called Billdog. If you really like Bane, and you speak Portuguese, and you have a spare $1500, and you’re fucking nuts, you can jump on a plane and watch Billdog in Rio, just before the World Cup.

5. There’s three shows!! All different. If you like Bane 3, come back and see Bane 2 and Bane.

Joe Bone’s Bane Trilogy at the Victoria Hotel

http://www.comedyfestival.com.au/2014/season/shows/trilogy-bane

 

Des Bishop Made in China

1) it’s one of those funny but also really interesting shows!

2) you can find out how many people have ridiculous Chinese characters as tattoos.

3) I talk really fast so you get great value for money in an hour. Plus I will even include a free lesson on basic mandarin if you apply now.

4) we can all dance to Jump Around in Chinese.

5) if you are a single lady I intend to be married by the end of the festival so if that’s your thing lets discuss our future. (My adopted Chinese family are giving me a lot of pressure) “No more stand one night for you!”

Des Bishop Made in China is on at The Victoria Hotel

http://www.comedyfestival.com.au/2014/season/shows/made-in-china-des-bishop

5 Good Reasons to see Rhys Nicholson Eurgh

1 It’s super awkward if an audience isn’t there.

2 It features an inflatable llama. Why wouldn’t you want to see that shit?

3 I have bills. You have money. Perfect relationship.

4 Seriously, Inflatable Llama.

5 I have created a potion for eternal life and will be handing out free samples to my audiences.

Rhys Nicholson performs Eurgh at Portland Hotel

http://www.comedyfestival.com.au/2014/season/shows/eurgh-rhys-nicholson

5 Good Reasons to see Michael Winslow’s Police Academy Sound FX Show

1) I was the funniest guy in the funniest film of the ’80’s. Wasn’t I? Don’t tell me they’ve been lying all along?

2) Homer Simpson said so on The Simpsons. Truly. Which is why I’ve been humble enough to quote the great man, above.

3) I’ve voiced an animated version of myself on Family Guy.

4) I’ve still got it. Jimmy Fallon, the new host of NBC’s flagship ‘Tonight Show’, called me a ‘True American Showbusiness Legend’ when I appeared on his show last month. My Mum cried.

5) Want proof? Check this out! http://www.wimp.com/michaelwinslow/

 

Michael Winslow is performing Police Academy Sound FX Show at the Yarraville Club from April 4

http://www.comedyfestival.com.au/2014/season/shows/police-academy-sound-fx-show-michael-winslow